The Blue's Clues Obsession

My kids were once very obsessed, like most little kids, with Blue's Clues. Even now, though they would never admit it to their friends, they still sometimes watch it. Even if it isn't as good with Joe as it was with Steve. I saw Steve more than I saw most people. I knew I was watching too much Blue's Clues when I began crushing on the man. Yes, I know their names. What's your point?

Like any child obsessed with a show, they began to covet the toys bearing the show's name. And like any evil childless relative, or evil parent on a revenge kick, my uncle bought them this toy. Oh, yes, it's cute, certainly. It's educational, too. And wholesome. Yes, all that. But it's noisy. It's a cute, bloody noisy toy. But, luckily, my kids eventually got bored with it and it was thrown in the toy box, never to be played with again. Or so I thought..

My cat somehow found the toy. He's become obsessed with it. He whines and makes you play it for him. If you don't, he gets nasty and nips you until you do play it. So I'm held hostage by my cat, forced to play a noisy toy for his amusement.

Now I'm sure there's a god and he's got one sick sense of humor.